Friday, September 24, 2010

Running to or from ??

That is the question that I keep asking myself. For the last 20 years I have been running....running hard, fast and loud. I'm still not sure if I am running from something (or me) or to something. What ever it is I keep chasing it or it keeps chasing me and I have had enough. This blog will show how I am trying to slow my pace and turn down the volume some in my life and just "Simply Live".

You may notice that this blog was started on the last of May of this year. That is when I knew for sure that my family would be leaving me. And I was right, they are all gone now. Leaving just me to live my life as best I can. I try to be the best long distance dad that can but I know I still lack in that department as well. I try.

Anyway, I am trying to repair myself thru this writing in some way I guess. I am broken....mentally....physcially and emotionally. I am much better than a few months ago but I still have healing to do in all the above.

I have lived a good and full life by any standards. Had all the things that people "think" they want or need. Had all the toys that us boys desire in life only to be left empty in the end. It's really not about things and I plan to let many of my toys go. I want to live a simple and content life at peace with myself. PEACE...that is what I must have been chasing all these years.

Being a man I have needs and desires and I have let those consume me most of my life. Don't laugh....I'm not the first nor will I be the last to do so. I hope that in finding my simple and content life those desires will fade away to some degree. They will never die.

I hope you will join me on this journey. I will update at least twice a week and more so if developments occur that are note worthy.


  1. My dear friend, I sincerely hope you find the peace you are looking for.

    I would love to accompany on your journey. I will be here for/with you for as long as you want me to be. :)

    Thank you for sharing another side of yourself with us.


  2. Felinae, I am happy to have you along for the ride my dear friend. There are many sides to me and this is the one I have kept from the world and from myself for far too long. It scares me...because it's the REAL me. The one I have run from all my life. I am ready to expose myself to "me" and the world. I feel it's the only way to grow away from who I am/was. I hope to come away a better man, better off.

    As always,
    Thank you for being here.